The explanation for this in Chinese and English are both long.
Basically it has something to do with the story of a mother shifting house for three times, just to make sure she has found the perfect environment for her child to grow up.
Today is a happy day.
;D , basically, I met alot of kids with Val and Jasmine ^___^ we took loads of pictures too.
Waiting for my phone to sync with the computer.
Then I will select some of the better looking pictures to upload.
Hahahaz.
We went to this event called Singapore Arts Festival ;) .
And the children put up a performance for us.
Although there were times when technical glitch occurred, children forgetting where they should stand on stage, children forgetting their lines, or child crying for her mum while performing, it was a wonderful performance because the kids are so adorable to the point where glitches like the above became negligible.
Dar and I went to choose our 2nd year anniversary.
Actually, I'm starting to feel a little lazy to carry on with this relationship le.
The more I think of it, the more I feel that, even though Dar has been very nice to me, I have started to change already.
Perhaps most part of me still love him.
But I am definitely starting to care less about this whole thing le.
I came home to the fact knowing that he watched porn again.
I feel a little upset.
But not to the point where, I need to cry and shout and land myself in a pathetic state.
I am starting to feel nothing.
To be honest.
Sometimes, when we exchange 'I love you," and I am asked to describe how I feel.
I can only say, I don't feel happy.
But heartache even though I may be smiling.
And everytime I know he watches, I will be reminded of times when I confronted him.
And the replies he gave me.
Like the ones present in the two screenshots below.
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| "Just tell me. Why is it that you always wanna check on me? Why is it that you wanna turn everything upside down? Sigh. You go home tonight ba." |
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| "You make me don't feel like going home tonight. Sigh. I'm walking to workplace now le." |
Truthfully speaking, I have never forgotten how hurt I felt.
And even now, when I am hurting, I am hurt mainly because of what I am reminded of, and not because of what he did behind my back ;) .
As I walk on the streets today, with Val and Jasmine.
I met many guys.
I came to interact with two.
One was the one who helped us took photo.
And the other one is the one who needed our help in surveys.
Both of them are damn cute.
I seriously would get the number of the guy who was asking help for survey.
Because he's really friendly.
And he didn't just walked off after the survey.
He stayed back to chat with both of us.
Hahaz, I swear I would get his number if I wasn't attached.
Me: JASMINNNNEEEE WAE AM I SINGLE )< !
Jasmine: Break up lahz, why no wanna break up ?!
Me: Because I am in a relationship mahz, cannot just hop because got some better looking guys ;x , not something I will do.
I am not trying to imply that I am charming or whatever.
I just wanna remind myself that in this world, there are many guys out there.
So really, I don't have to sacrifice my youth on this one.
I don't know why I choose to continue with this relationship.
Although Alee has promised to not let me regret it.
And he'd do anything to make me happy and that he won't do anything to make me sad, he went against his words again and again.
And honestly, I don't have much hope in his words anymore.
I know why my mother says to always give myself chance to widen my social cycle.
Because although I keep saying this world lacks humanity, this society is corrupted, there're bound to be people who share the same thought as me.
And I wanna give myself chance to know this people.
Alee, you need to know.
From the moment I had that mindset.
I am already prepared to see you with another girl, pretending to not know who you are, and drop whatever I have with you and move on.
Because damn.
You are the not the man that can bring security in my life.
For love, I am willing to stake almost my everything.
But for you, I have more than second thoughts.
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